Alternate title for this chapter: Vomit.
Lilith and Dirk went on vacation shortly after being married. They’d wanted to wait to have kids (although they’d both rolled the want for a baby), to travel a bit and save money, but everything FAILED. Lilith came down with food poisoning a few hours into their island getaway, and her birth control seemed to fail (maybe it doesn’t work in vacation worlds?), which made her completely miserable and near death. They had to cut their trip short.
So Lilith has been stuck in bed for a couple of days. It’s been a blast.
Lilith: It really has. I’ve been reading the book you wrote, Fifty Shades of You, and it’s terrific. 10/10 would recommend.
Ha… ha… I don’t know where she got that from. Let’s continue, shall we?
When she’s not sick from E. coli, she’s sick from the demon spawn. This particular shot was taken after she’d thrown up three times in a row. Do we enjoy looking at filthy toilets? Probably not, but there it is.
Now, imagine the above image for another 24 hours, and then…
Ah, there we go. All better.
Now, don’t tell the others, but this house is my favorite house to play. Idk, I really like Lilith and Dirk. I had considered moving them to Strangetown after they graduated college, but then I remembered that for the Sims 2 that requires effort or something, so they stayed.
Dirk is basically the easiest sim to take care of, so he takes care of Lilith to compensate for my simming incompetence. He’s been working his way up in the Medical career and is currently a General Practitioner. He also makes spaghetti, like, every night.
Dirk: I’m getting excited for the baby, are you?
Lilith: I don’t know, Dirk, look at my face. Do I look excited? I’m terrified. What do babies like? What do they EAT?
Dirk: Ok chill. We’ll be fine. There’s a parenting book in the bookcase or something.
Lilith: Probably next to Fifty Sh–
Nope. Let’s not do that again.
Lilith: Okay, but Maddie, did you ACTUALLY say eleventh? Because if so, I like you way better than my sister.
She’ll be a super good parent for sure.
And I love how Madeline is accepted by all, it makes me feel so happy for her.
I took this picture because I wanted to be like one of those artsy simmers who takes pictures like this except they’re way better and have more aesthetic. Hold on, I’ll fix it.
Omg I’m so good. So professional. So amazing.
I don’t have photoshop on this laptop
Dirk: This parenting book isn’t too bad, actually. There are lots of pictures. LOL boobs.
Lilith: I feel funny.
Dirk: Signs of labor. Okay, uh, it says the woman will feel funny, stand up, and probably hold her stomach with a grimace on her face while rocking back and forth. Interesting.
Lilith: Does it say the man will be kicked in the balls if he doesn’t get his ass off the couch?
Dirk: Oh, shit, babe, I think you’re in labor.
Lilith: What clued you in, Dirk? THE BABY COMING OUT OF MY STOMACH LIKE AN ALIEN?
Dirk: Ah, I can’t look, this is a horrifying experience.
Lilith: It’s already over, Dirk. Look, it’s our kid.
Dirk: Oh, HELL YEAH. OUR KID. WOO, we did that!
Lilith: I. I did that.
This is Marley Dreamer. His name was inspired by the poster on their wall. I feel like they’re totally the types to name their kid Marley. Plus, I kinda like that name.
And ten seconds later, the carpool arrives for Lilith and she’s off to work.
Lilith: Maternity leave is for PUNKS.
Marley kicks off his life by swatting at dangly things. We could’ve gotten a cat. It’d be basically the same thing.
And this is where he becomes the first and only baby to ever receive a bath in my game.
I am actually amazed at how well Marley is being taken care of. Honestly, this was the easiest household with a baby in it. Is this real? Is it all a trick? Is toddlerhood going to be HORRID?
We will soon find out.
But we won’t find out until next time we play this house because the week is overrrrr.
Does he look like a demon? He kind of does. I hope he’s good.
Anyway, next time, we’ll most likely have some DRAMA at Dustin Broke’s house because he’s a mess. Thank you for reading! Happy simming!