Stray Cat: Man I’onno ’bout y’all Creepers, man. I’onno ’bout y’all, man. Y’all some crazy people.
Welcome back to the Creeper Legacy. Please enjoy your stay :)
I told myself as I installed Pets: "Starla, you are NOT going to go crazy trying to adopt every single pet that walks by the door."
Well. This is the first pet that walked by the door and I. WANT. IT.
Just look at it! The cool striping, no tail, different colored eyes, weirdo expression, funny accent (in my head). It’s perfect for the family.
Stray Cat: On’y thang is, I ain’t easily bought, see. Y’all gon’ hafta try real hard a get me, man.
Yeah well I bet a nice…
BRUSHING will do the trick.
Stray Cat: Oh yeeeeah, tha’s nice, man, I’ll give ya dat. I ain’t been brush like this since the game spawrnt me.
So are you moving in now?!
Stray Cat: Hmm… Nope. I’on’t thank so.
And then he completely vanished right there on the spot. Didn’t even have the decency to RUN away. Sigh. Oh well.
Later on that night…
Burglar: You had your day SHAT on yet today, Starla?
Yeah, actually there was this stray cat that–
Burglar: Shut up and tell me where the fine china’s at.
Um… I don’t really know, it just kind of appears…?
Sage Moonblood: Burglar? What burglar?
In other words, Sage got up and beat the woman up and I didn’t get the screenshots.
Sage Moonblood: Fast like ninja!
I did get this though, not even two seconds after all that. What in the world, Sage?
Officer: I wish I had a big net to catch criminals in. *sighs* I don’t though so your burglar got away.
Imagine he’s talking like Napoleon Dynamite. That’s what I did :D
Officer: I will get her next time, though! I promise! Even if I have to weave the net myself!
Sage Moonblood: Back to bed. I am going back. To bed.
Sage is still unemployed (like most of the US, thanks economy) and stays home with the toddler twins (Spec Wildhorse and Seven Sirius, in case you forgot – I don’t have shots of them because I’m shameful). Being a partying technophobe, it’s hard for her to find much to do besides drink and dance.
So the obvious solution was to get her an ant farm.
Sage Moonblood: Shouldn’t they be digging tunnels or something?
Sage Moonblood: Whatever. *dances some more*
She’s worse than a toddler.
At night, when Hermione’s at home with the kids, Sage works at her bar (now called The Escape Hatch).
Judy Bunch: HOT WINGS PLEASE.
Remember how Judy was in the second chapter and now she’s in the 51st? Of course you do :P Ah, nostalgia.
The bar is pretty busy most of the time, mostly because the only other competition in town is that hick bar that came with Pets.
Nick Alto: WINNING!
Jack Bunch: *losing*
Is it just me or does Sage look really bored in all these shots?
Sage Moonblood: Because you’re being boring and I’m highly intoxicated, buzzkill.
Ron Weasley: Remember me? I’m still watching you, you know. Watching…
Sage Moonblood: I’m watching you too. Watching you give me eight bucks for these onion rings.
LOL that’s funny because he’s poor. Get it? Aaaha. Haa. Ahh. Moving on.
Hopefully he’s not watching this though. That would be… well, normal, I guess. For this legacy at least.
Glowing woohooium and a hover bed. Y’all some freaky chicks.
I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but my rule is that after having all the kids they’re going to have, my sims only woohoo if they roll the want for it. Horndog Hermione rolls the want ALL THE TIME. I also have risky woohoo on and she’s got about 11 days until elderhood. You do the math D:
Check out the moodlet you get with it though. Wooooorth it.
Breakfast time in the Creeper house is almost like breakfast time in any other house, only not. Here, Hermione’s making breakfast for the family. Pancakes. Mmm.
Sage makes her breakfast at the same time so they can all eat (or drink) as a family.
Peaches Honeyblossom, our neurotic perceptive genius, prefers to bake her meal separately.
Peaches Honeyblossom: I trust no one with my food.
She eats at her own table and cleans up her own dishes, aww :D
Peaches Honeyblossom: If it weren’t for child labor laws and things costing money, I’d be living on my own right now.
In your very own plastic bubble, I’m sure.
I was really nervous about this for a second. I really didn’t want any more babies D: But it wasn’t typical "From Unknown Causes But Really You’re Knocked Up" nausea. It was the "we aren’t even gonna tell you ’cause we’re EA and we don’t have to" kind.
But as it turns out, if you stick plasma fruit in the fridge when you don’t know what else to do with it, even if you also have plenty of apples and grapes and even limes, your sims will put it in their food. Because, you know, mmm, plasma fruit pancakes sound delicious! Smart, Hermione.
So now Peaches Honeyblossom’s room is pretty darn popular.
Peaches Honeyblossom: Pwnt.
Hermione: Oh, honestly, it was ONE time!
Segue Deer: A change of topic is coming! A change of topic is coming! Honk, honk!
A few nights later, our burglar comes back for more. Sage is way too excited to see her again. You’re disappointing me, woman!
Sage Moonblood: Oh lighten up, it’s just a game.
Burglar: Oh yes, the rush I’ve been waiting for! Come to me, lady in red!
Sage wins. Of course. And then they turn into the perturbed-faced twins.
Burglar: Grrr >:(
Sage Moonblood: Arrgh >:(
Burglar: Hmm >:(
Sage Moonblood: Hurr >:(
Burglar: Ungh. Hello.
Sage Moonblood: Rrrr >:(
Officer: What’s wrong with her?
Burglar: She’s not gonna break character. Let’s just get this over with.
And then Sage turns into a cavewoman.
Sage Moonblood: *disgruntled grunt* You take woman?!
Officer: Yes! I still don’t have a net, but I will improvise with the air! Swoosh! There. You’re netted.
Burglar: Oh no. Please. Not the net. Ah, you got me o_o
Sage Moonblood: Woman stay! Woman stay! *stomps foot*
Officer: No, the woman can’t stay. She broke the law! Twice!
Sage: *is now full-on gorilla*
Burglar: Can I just call my babysitter and let her know she can have my kids?
Officer: Oh, dear, what a piece of work, amirite?!
Officer: See? I told you I’d get her and now I did! I did it for YOU, Sage! Yaaaay!
Sage Moonblood: Kay, get out of my house now.
Ants: Loooooook! Tunnel!
Darren Criss: Hey, I thought I was invited to a party.
Darren: Why are there children doing homework in here? Pack it up, guys!
Andie: Well hellooooo there, Darren Criss.
Darren: Hey. What’s up?
Andie: If I were a dude, it’d be my–
Reignbeau: Hey there, handsome. Ever do it with a cat lady?
Darren: Um. Can’t say I have.
Reignbeau: Well you’re lookin’ right at one. How about it?
Darren: I’m trying not to look, actually, thanks.
LOL Reignbeau’s never gonna get married.
Tamara: Feel free to check out my beautiful ass as I run by, Mr. Criss.
Tu Morrow: Bitch, I will cut you. He’s mine.
Starla: I’m going to have to mass murder these females, aren’t I?
Vita Alto: MOVE, I NEED TO GET NEXT TO DARREEEEEN!
Darren: Maybe I should… go.
I changed my simself’s outfit again XD I really like those boots.
Starla: I look like a doofus.
Andie: He can’t take his eyes off of me, you notice that?
Starla: Yeah, I’m pretty sure Tamara Donner’s ass is in his thought bubble right now though.
Andie: Whatever. He wants me. Anyway, what’s this party for?
Starla: I dunno, birthdays or something? Who cares anyway, right?
Hermione: Hey, Sagey, where are you with Spec?! I want them to grow up together!
Seven Sirius: *is actually pictured here*
Sage Moonblood: Whoops, it’s my birthday too!
Everyone: Yaaaay, Sage! Woo!
Way to upstage your children. Nevermind that’s it’s kind of my fault XD
Sage Moonblood: Ooow! Getting old hurts!
Sage Moonblood: But damn, I make it look good.
Seven Sirius: Worst. Birthday. Ever.
Seven Sirius is now an easily impressed loner perfectionist. I can’t say I’m a big fan of those traits.
Seven Sirius: By the way, I go by just 7 now. Use it.
Spec Wildhorse: When I open my eyes, I will be a child!
You’re a child now, loser.
Spec Wildhorse: Oh. Whoa, I’m taller!
Yeah, it happens. Spec Wildhorse is now a friendly virtuoso with a good sense of humor. Any changes to your name, Spec?
Spec Wildhorse: Oh is that an option? Okay, call me… Hickle.
So what is an old alcoholic to do when there’s no one to take care of every day?
Sage Moonblood: I have my bar and my stereo. I’m good.
No, I think I have a better idea.
Sage Moonblood: I was afraid of that.
Opening day of the Creeper Family Daycare! I joked about it before, but now that it’s actually an option thanks to Generations, I couldn’t resist.
That’s what any parent would like to see when they drop their kids off at daycare in the morning.
Hey, it’s Leeeeerooooooy Jeeeeeeeenkiiins.
Leroy: Creeper. Leroy Creeper.
Yeah, yeah. Used to be Leroy Goss, but since your mom gave you up because she was a skank, you took Audio’s last name (it helped with the inheritance too, I imagine).
Leroy: Um, I kind of have to get to work, can you stop blocking the doorway?
Leroy: There, little Wyatt. We’ll set you down by this filthy toilet. Have a great day at daycare!
Wyatt: Please don’t leave me here :(
Claire: Is that alcohol on her breath? Oh, wait, no. That’s my breath. Phew.
Stacey: Mummaaaaa, come baaaack!
Sage Moonblood: Oh, you can’t be stressed out, kid. You’re a toddler. It’s not like you have bills to pay or baby daddies.
Sage Moonblood: Look! Watch these dance moves! They make everyone feel better!
"Stacey would like to be having more fun right now."
Sage Moonblood: Yeah. That makes two of us. Thanks for this, Starla. Really. Thanks.
I gave Stacey a makeover because I couldn’t stand it anymore.
Stacey: That didn’t help my mood, just so you know.
Sage Moonblood: Oh my god, my head is pounding!
Probably because you’ve forgotten about your 3:00 party drink.
Sage Moonblood: And I don’t even know where that other kid went.
Speaking of kids.
Peaches Honeyblossom: You forgot my birthday too!
Tabooger: And then she got weird. Like Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen weird.
Peaches is now a neurotic perceptive genius who loves the outdoors.
And she is suddenly obsessed with horses. More on that next time.
That’s it for now! I know there weren’t many kid scenes in this chapter. Whoops. But to make it up to you, here’s a 26 second video of them dancing. Just because.
Thank you for reading, thank you for hanging around for me during my horrendously long absence, and thank you, thank you for all of your beautiful comments :D Much <3 and, as always, happy simming!