Chapter Twenty-Nine: Domo Arigato

Amg SimBots snore in binary code, haha.  SillyTS3.  Always full of surprises.

Hi!  In case you’ve forgotten: Last chapter, the new Creeper SimBot, Roderick, and Fifi were in the junk yard collecting scraps together.  It was Fifi’s way of peacekeeping, as the rest of the Creepers weren’t too impressed with the rusty newcomer.  It seems that Fifi’s addicting personality works its charm even on SimBots, however, because Roderick randomly rolled a wish to kiss her. 

Fifi: Meaning I’ve still got it.

Of course.

Also, Moon Unit had been thrown into story progression for all of two minutes and was landed with a Face 1 boyfriend, Abram.  I couldn’t decide whether or not I could deal with him joining the family because he’s so blah, so I didn’t let them be very romantic (Moon didn’t care at all, so it wasn’t hard), but I didn’t have her dump him either until I decided what to do about it.  Thankfully, a couple of readers politely informed me that ABRAMSUCKS, so I didn’t feel as bad for not wanting to marry him in. 

Only, then this happened…

Moon Unit: I’ve finally rolled a romantic want for you, Abram…

Abram: Oh, yeah?  Is it a good one?  Involving gropage?

Moon Unit: Possibly…

Barf.  But thanks for the points.

…You can stop now.

This is as far as the Moon Unit/Abram romance went, however.

Moon Unit: I can’t do this.  No freaking way.  I call upon the powers of my inner being!  KABAM, WE ARE NOW BROKEN UP.

Abram: Was it… was it my kiss?  Am I doin it rong?  But story progression thought we were meant to be!

Pretty Lilac Washer and Dryer: Where’s the popcorn when you need it?

Moon Unit: Oh, I dunno. Maybe it’s the fact that you’re BORING, or that you’re wearing this stupid button down shirt with track pants!

Abram: What’s wrong wi–

Moon Unit: BUTTON DOWN SHIRT WITH TRACK PANTS, ABRAM.

Abram: Kindly die in a fire, Moon Unit Creeper. 

Moon Unit: Oh, don’t push me, buddy.  I could make you die in far worse. 

Abram: Your daughter broke my poor Face 1 heart, Mr. Creeper.

Liang: Quiet, the game’s on.

Moon Unit: Man, that incense sure does a good job of covering up the scent of WHINY LITTLE BABIES.

Because I’m nice (pahaha), I let Abram stay for a farewell dinner of Fifi’s Famous Mac and Cheese.  He mostly just distanced himself from the Creepers and it was all in all very uncomfortable.

Abram: Maybe if I choke myself with this spoon, all my pain will go away.

Moon Unit: Quit being so dramatic and do it then.  No one would care.

Abram was never heard from again.

The next day, Moon was given the opportunity to convince my crazy elder simself that logic is important or something.  I guess my sim was a non-believer in thinking? O_o

Starla: Bwahaha, evil plottage and such.

Moon Unit: Hello, Starla.

Starla: Crap.  This can’t be good.

Moon Unit: I just came by to tell you that logic is great.  We like logic. Logic is the reason why civilization has continued to flourish for thousands of years.

Starla: I daresay it is not, you filthy logical sim of inferiority!  The only reason we have survived is because someone, somewhere hasn’t deleted our save file!  In conclusion: logic sucks, so there.

Moon Unit: Okay, Starla, tell me, don’t you use just a little bit of logic when you’re masterminding plots?  When you’re thinking of ways to take over the world, you don’t just plan a sloppy job of it, do you?  You think things through very carefully.

Starla: Huh.  Touché, oddly named girl.  I have seen the light!

Moon Unit: Good.  Now for my second mission today: Off you go to die.

RIP, Starla Simself.  She really did die right after Moon Unit got home from completing this opportunity :(  At least we know her powers still work, I guess.

 

Meanwhile, in Roderick’s world…

I stuck him on the inventing table in the hopes that his massive crush on Fifi would begin to fizzle.  I soon found out that our little Rod is an AMAZING inventor.  His first invention was created just a few sim hours after he began working on it.

Still, it didn’t seem to pacify his growing devotion to his dream woman. 

Roderick: Fiiiiiiifiiiiiiii…

Things only seemed to get worse as the days wore on.  He found himself unable to resist having a look at the woman as she showered in her sweet bathing suit.  Apparently whoever created him knew he’d be joining a family of creepers one day.  At least she wasn’t nekkid.

Roderick: Her mad rapping skillz make her even more attractive <3

Fifi has always, always rapped in the shower.  I’ve gotten to where I rap with her every time because I’ve heard it so much.

One day, as the two played video games together, the tension became too much for poor Roderick.  He was absolutely lovesick, and he decided then and there that he would stop at nothing to get what he wanted.  What is it with Fifi, man?

Fifi: I’m the greatest, duh.

Seriously, he rolled this as they were playing video games D:

What’s worse, though…

Is that Fifi was beginning to feel the same way.  She couldn’t admit it, of course, being happily married and all.

She also wants a tattoo, lulz.  Oh, Fifi.

Soon Rod found himself shamelessly planning the murder of Fifi’s spouse.

Roderick: Useless man.  He does not love his wife like I love her.  I have 800 Terabytes of it.  I doubt he can even handle 1 Gig.

Liang: I still don’t get it.  

Fifi became Roderick’s muse.  He invented many things in honor of her.  Especially the octopus thing on the left, because it’s pretty freaking cool.

These were all created in only about two days.  Not too shabby, Roderick.

Our newly single heiress was having romance problems of her own.  She headed to the park to find a potential mate, but it seemed to be overrun by children.

Moon Unit: Eugh, kids.  Lost starts in 30 minutes, how will I have a freaking spouse by then?

Kid: *stands there creepily*

And he wasn’t the only creepy kid there.  This glitchy haired girl was having a bake sale.

Glitchy Haired Girl: For the last time, come back down to my head!  Please!

I want that umbrella thing.

Moon Unit: Hello, floating haired child.  Your weirdness is not helping with my disliking of children…

Moon Unit: BUT I CAN HAZ CARAMEL BROWNIE?!

She was able to buy the brownie and it went into her inventory, but the only option she had for it was to clean it up.  I believe that’s the very first glitch I’ve experienced with Ambitions so far.  And it disappointed me because it made me want a brownie and I couldn’t even enjoy one through my sim, darn it.

So because the spouse hunt was epic fail (and she couldn’t possibly miss her TV show), Moon went home and did what any single sim might do when they’re desperate for a spouse but too lazy to look for one.

She ordered a pizza, hoping the delivery boy was hot.

Or even a boy.

But it wasn’t.  It was an angry girl who scared me just a bit.

Delivery Girl:  Here’s your pizza and I hope you friggin’ choke on it!

The pizza delivery girl’s anger spread to Moon, although she looked a bit more psychotic…  It had been a pretty bad day, after all.

Moon Unit: HAVE SOME PIZZA, MOTHER!!

After Liang left for work one morning (he’s a Rookie, by the way), Roderick decided he couldn’t fight this feeling anymore.  He’d forgotten what he started fighting for.  And if he had to crawl upon the floor, come crashing through her door, baby, he couldn’t fight this feeling anymore.

Ahem. Sorry.  Got sucked into REO Speedwagon for a minute.

Roderick: Fiiiiiiiiiiifiiiiiiiii…

Fifi: Let’s do this.

The kiss didn’t make me cringe like I thought it would, though it still seemed wrong (not just because she was betraying Liang).  It can’t be comfortable to kiss a SimBot though.  I mean, their mouths could, like, fit your head in them.

Fifi: *SimBot love*

Roderick: *fighting the urge to gnaw on Fifi’s head*

Blank Wall: *is boringly blank*

Sorry, we can’t afford decorations yet and there aren’t any artists in the house at the moment.

Fifi: Wow, Rod, that was like nothing I’ve ever felt before.  If snogging was that intense, I can’t imagine what woohoo would be like.  To the bedroom to experiment!

Fifi: First, I want to make it very clear that I absolutely adore my husband, Roderick.  I have a romantic wish locked in for him later, in fact.  The only reason I’m giving into my urges is because I can blame it on being old and senile.  Plus, my life bar is full so I’ll be dying soon anyway.  Might as well live it up while I can, amirite?

Roderick:  Yarly.  Now shut up and get under the covers, my human love.

INFIDELITY.

But more importantly, pointssssssss.  I’m trying to get Fifi to 200,000 LTH.  She’s currently at 167,310.  This was for a good cause, I promise.

Later that night, the brave Creeper women decided they both wanted tattoos.  So, wearing identical grins, they bounded over to the salon at 2 am.

Moon Unit: You reek of rusted metal, mom.  What gives?

Fifi: You don’t even want to know.

Moon Unit: And is that oil I smell too?

Fifi: Yeah, most likely.

Moon Unit: You’re right.  Maybe I don’t want to know.

Fifi: I guess the salon’s not 24 hours like we thought.  It’s a good thing they left the doors unlocked, though.  We can give each other tattoos.  It’ll make it more special.

Moon Unit: Mom, neither of us have ever even SEEN a tattoo needle… thingy whatever.  This is a disaster waiting to happen.

Fifi:  Are you my only Brave traited daughter or not? Me first!

Moon Unit: Fiiine.

Moon Unit: So I put this here, right?  And then a pop-up thing is supposed to come up?

Fifi: That’s how it’s supposed to go, yeah…

Moon Unit: So then why are we still on this screen?  Where’s the pop-up?

Well, she asked for it, didn’t she?

Moon Unit got a little trigger happy.  Fifi has really BAD tattoos everywhere now, and she has to wait until the tattoo artist is there to get them removed.

Fifi: I didn’t even get my wish fulfilled.

No, she didn’t.

So then it was Moon Unit’s turn.  Would Fifi get her revenge?

Should I end the update here? 

Nah.

Fifi: I am so awesome.

Moon Unit: …Did you put a Post-It on my back?

Fifi must have a natural talent for tattooing.  Of course she does, she’s Fifi freaking Trixibelle.

The next day, Fifi heads back to the salon (this time during actual business hours).

Fifi: So me and my daughter came in last night and gave each other tattoos, but my daughter wasn’t blessed with mad tattooing skillz like me, so I’m all screwed up now.

Tattoo Artist: You did what?  You broke into my shop and used my stuff without permission?  That’s pretty much illegal, lady.

Fifi: Well, in all fairness, you left it unlocked.  Anyway, it was a mother-daughter bonding experience gone all wrong.  Can you fix it?

Tattoo Artist: I could, yeah, but I don’t really know if I want to.  Maybe I feel like you deserve it just a bit.

Fifi: What if I give you this pitifully heartbroken expression?  Will you do it now?

Tattoo Artist: Sigh.  Okay.

In the salon as well was Diva Muffin, macking on this guy.  His name is Kenya and they’ve been married for a little while, but I forgot to mention it.  He wasn’t an elder when it happened. 

Kenya: Aren’t I cute?

You look like a boring elder face 1 to me.

One of Twallan’s new options is adoption.  Gay couples and elderly with no children can now adopt a child on their own (so exciting!), and I guess since Kenya has become an elder with no children, the two of them adopted this cutie named Brant.

He’s got the purple eyes I tried to get when Diva Muffin was spawned, so I’m pretty happy that he’s joined the Creeper family.

Still, I hope Diva has a biological child as well.  Even if it does mostly look like a face 1.

Moon Unit came to check on her mom’s tattoo removal and ended up standing awkwardly next to this frightening looking teenager.  You know you’re creepy when you make everyone around you uncomfortable just by standing there.  Potential spouse?

If I’m desperate.

She also ran into this teen, who didn’t waste any time getting to the point. He’s actually got some interesting features.

Hector: Age me up and marry me in, foxy lady.  I promise you won’t regret it.

Moon Unit: Sure, you’ll do.

Moon Unit: Everyone, meet Herbert.

Hector.

Moon Unit: Whatever.  I might be marrying him, so be nice.

Moon Unit: Grow up to be spouse-worthy, Herman!

Hector!

Hector: Birthday cake!  I’ve never had this stuff.

Hector: Hmm… I wish to grow into this nose!  And to marry that bag of sweetness over there.

Moon Unit: Charming.

His nose is sort of odd.

Moon Unit: Oh god, more track pants.  I’m going to be sick.

Hector: CURSE YOU, TRACK PANTS!

So the question remains:  Will Hector and his nose be enough for Moon Unit, or will I have to resort to the creep from the salon?  Or someone else?  Do I know what I’m doing?  No.  Thank you for reading!  Next time: Babies?  Happy simming!

22 thoughts on “Chapter Twenty-Nine: Domo Arigato

  1. Awesome-sauce! I love the robot lover. I wish I had tried the inventor track from Ambitions before I did any of the others. He’s so cool. I wonder if you can get a lady robot? It could be like Rosey from the Jetsons. Well, anyway great update!

    Like

    1. You CAN get a female simbot – my sim left his wife for one 0_0

      Great update! Serves Liang right for bein’ such a butthole in the alternate reality 0_0

      Like

      1. Haha nice! Can you imagine how terrible that would be? “What happened?” “Oh, he found someone rustier and more metallic.”
        I didn’t even think of that, but yeah! Serves him right! Thank you!

        Like

    2. I’d only tried the inventor once before, and her inventing was so slow I was kind of discouraged. Maybe simbots have a natural talent for it? I dunno, but he’s an inventing machine! Rosey from the Jetsons would be amazing to have around! Thank you again for reading!

      Like

  2. Okay, you nearly killed me. I laughed so hard… which isn’t a bad thing unless you have a chest infection. I have been following your blog for a while, and it just gets better and better!

    I am so jealous you have Ambitions, I want it, but apparently in order to receive goods you have to exchange ‘cash’.

    Good luck getting to 200k! I’ve done it accidently before.

    Like

    1. Aww, I hope you feel better :) Thank you so much!
      Haha the only reason I got it now was because I had a promotional discount code. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have it yet :/
      Thank you! Accidentally? Haha, sweet. Sounds like me. Most of my accomplishments are accidental.

      Like

  3. I like Hector :) To me, he seems like a real creeper, unlike Abram – c’mon, so far we’ve had a nerd in denial, an old cat lady, a guy who randomly passes out and a stalker – we need a random guy who got picked up at the tatoo parlour (0_0)

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  4. OMG Scarlet! I laughed so hard I almost woke my husband up. OMG THIS WAS AWESOME! And the bot love, ewww and wow at the same time. I had freakin tears in my eyes, I was dying with laughter. Thanks for another BRILLIANT! update!!!!

    Like

  5. I fully blame you for the lost of my last day and a half of life, and the $30 it cost me for Ambitions. Because reading your legacy made me make my own. You big jerk.

    <3

    The Creepers are my faaaaave.

    Like

    1. Hahaha HI CALLI! I’m reading your legacy as I type this cause I got mad multi-tasker skillz, yo!

      <333

      Thank you for reading my nerdiness!

      Like

  6. Hi I’m a new reader. It took me a little over a week to read your blog from begining to end (I have two small children). It was SO worth the read, thanks for the wonderful entertainment.
    And I love Hector and that she just can’t get his name right! Good stuff!

    Like

    1. Hi Sarah! Welcome to the creepiness! I know what you mean, I’ve got two little ones as well. Thank you so much for reading!

      Like

  7. Oooh, I just finished reading your legacy from the start! It’s a lot of fun! :D Can’t wait till the next update, Herman.. er.. Herb-.. Hector looks really sweet! Beside the trackpants XD And the simbot seems to be a lot of fun! Do they die though do you know? Or are you stuck with him for generations on end if he doesn’t move out?

    Like

    1. Thank you so much! Lol, yeah freaking track pants. I think simbots do die. They have a lifebar like an elder and when you hover over it it says “Simbots live longer than other sims”. Rod’s bar is full so far, but no signs of death yet. Thank you for reading, and welcome!

      Like

    1. She’s mine too I think! I’m glad she can make you laugh! I think it’s funny that Moon not only screwed up once, but she put about a dozen terrible tattoos all over Fifi! Track pants must want to marry in, haha. Thank you so much!

      Like

  8. Hi!
    I’m connor95 over on LiveJournal… I’ve been reading this for a while but I’ve never commented… (I have no idea why…)

    I have to say, this legacy is HILARIOUS!

    This ends my comment, but I’ll make longer comments in the future… :P

    Like

    1. Hey Connor! I do that a lot, too (read legacies and never comment)!

      Thank you so much! I’m glad you like it!

      Can’t wait to hear from you again!

      Like

  9. YAY! finally joined wordpress – now ive just got to get my legacy goin’ :) I’d be honoured to give you a link but ….. I don’t know how? XD noobish ;)

    Like

    1. Yaya, welcome! Haha, it’s okay. You can go to Links and Add New, if you want to link to me from your blog. I’ll definitely be reading your legacy and adding it to my Must Reads!

      Like

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